The last two days hae passed impossibly slowly. The heavy cloud of my family's departure seemed to have dragged down the passage of time. It's still painful, but the days pass slightly faster now, so it's not ALL doom and gloom.

September will roll around by the end of next week, and Mom's most probably coming back not long after that. She has to bring my travel documents and sort out the whole deal with the tenants.

Not to mention she has to attend my POP.

Gotta go clean out my locker now. Write more later.
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One of my squadmates just said something that lifted my spirits. 20 more days to POP. We're also starting to learn the 9th Infantry cheer, whcih is used only during POP.

It's all coming to an end and I could be happier.

And now, to wait for my ORD...
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Maybe the family's visit had rekindled the depression in me. I feel vacant, meaningless. Depressed beyond all measure during my free time. Again.

I can't contemplate doing ANYTHING except write in this notebook or call home.

I'll go plan my vacation now.

About three more weeks to POP. I'd be very happy with that, if not for the fact that it means three more weeks in here and two more years out there.

Just got off the phone with mom. They're all packed and ready to go. In two hours they'll be on a flight back home. Thte two little ones are starting school.

I just wish I got to spend a little bit more time with them. Not even to be on the plane with them. Just a few more seconds.

Apparently the previous owner of the apartment came and moved ALL the furniture out. Even the ones he said he'd let us keep.

So Saturday I might actually be going home to an EMPTY apartment with a fridge that doesn't work.

My mom's dumplings are in that fridge...
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It is currently 4:40pm. Which means I've been alone again for 40 minutes.

I'm overwhelmed with a desire to call my mom, but know I can't.

There's a torrent of emotions welling up inside me and I can only do what I've alwyas done. Silently let them slam upon the wall I've erected so long agao then let them drip out bit by bit via this notebook.

I'm utterly alone here. Utterly alone.
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Just got off the phone with Dad. Talkin' to him made me feel better. It's amazing how much good a familiar voie does when you're homesick.

He also gave ma a good idea of what to do while passing the time. List out what I want to do over block leave.

I'll start on that right away.

It's weired how much the thought of my family's departure is affecting me. Even though they're leaving tomorrow, the thought of going back to an empty apartment this weekend is bringing back feelings of depression that haven't plagued me for three weeks.

Mom says she might be coming right back to help me look for tenants. Looking forward to that, even though tenants would mean my family can't visit as easily from now on.

At the beginning, we were given a surveyasking if we were "completely unmotivated to serve NS." I put "somewhat disagree" back then, because I wanted to lose weight.

But if I were to take that survey again, I think I'd put "completely agree".
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Just got back from the march. Not much to say except it was easier than before and I'm looking forward to the 24 klick.

This week is heavy on grenades. Saturday's bookout is delayed so that we can have our live throw. Just as well, there's nothing to go home TO.

On the brighter side, it turns out that going overseas for block leave ain't that hard. My only worry is that I still don't know when the MDC audtions are. For all I know, t hey could be over block leave.

I'm quite sure that you've noticed the missing gap of a week in my correspondence. I assure you all that it is not because I grew tired of writing. It is truly because I had honestly no time to write.

Three days were spent outfield in our sit test*. The next day was spent carrying closets (200 of them) down from our bunks and new closets (another 200 of them) up to our bunks.

We did this via the stairs, by the way.

We did, however, get to book out quite early on Friday, which also caused us book in real early today.

It was something I really didn't want to do. I cannot stress enough how much I DIDN'T want to do it.

This was the family's last weekend here.

I just got off the phone with mom. For the past 3 weeks I've been fuelled by the thought of being in the same city with them. You've no idea how much it killed me to not be able to say "see you next week" over the phone just now.

Just gonna have to fight hard for that overseas permit in September.

I will NOT be trapped here for two years.

Gotta go now. 16 km road march tomorrow. Gonna die...

*Situational Test- a series of problem solving tests presented to us in order to evaluate who suitable for Officer training.